On The Seventh Day Of Christmas...

... I picked my word for 2012.

FORTITUDE

I have to be honest. I had a hard time settling on this word. In fact, I'm still kind of nervous about it being my theme word for 2012. How can I, who oftentimes fears the worst when storms hit, ever possibly hope to keep even an ounce of courage? How can I, who sometimes feels like simply giving up, even dream of remaining strong through it all, whatever "it" is?

But this word picked me.

Since the Advent season begin way back at the end of November, I've been reading a daily devotions book. On a day during which a lot was weighing particularly heavy on my heart, the scripture passage mentioned was Mark 4:35-41.

"That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, 'Let us go over to the other side.' Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him. A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, 'Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?'
He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
He said to his disciples, 'Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?'
They were terrified and asked each other, 'Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!'

Oh sure, I've read that story many times. Usually my reaction is something like, "Really, dudes. He's right there with you. Surely there's no need to overreact and panic." This time though, the message behind that story hit me and my reaction was, "Really, JM." (Yeah, I refer to myself as "JM" ;-)) "He's right here with you. Surely there's no need to overreact and panic."

I know remembering to remain strong won't be easy. It's so much easier for me to be fearful about things unknown than to remember He's got a plan. It's so much easier for me to want to take control of situations that are out of my control than to simply let go and let Him do the driving, so to speak. But I hope that by making Fortitude my theme word, I learn to "Let go and Let God" in times of distress.

Even if doing so scares me.